


Nobody Can Know

by ShellytheShark



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, But They Still Play Volleyball, Eventual Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, New Chapter Every Tuesday, Oikawa Needs His Iwa-chan, Oikawa is a Sad and Broken Boy, Plenty of Characters Yet to Come, Secret Relationship, Soulmate AU, but also lots of fluff, tags will be updated with every chapter, tons of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-01-07 11:16:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18409529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShellytheShark/pseuds/ShellytheShark
Summary: Soulmate AU where soulmates feel a spark when they touch each other for the first time. They also have a vague tug that draws them together, and they can sense if the other is physically hurt.Oikawa and Iwaizumi are soulmates, but nobody can know.New chapter every Tuesday.Temporary hiatus





	1. No Matter What

**Author's Note:**

> This will be my first series that I publish, so I hope you all enjoy! Thanks again to LyreForSyren for proofreading for me!

Oikawa leaned back, leaving Iwaizumi chasing after his lips.

“Tooru, what's wrong?” he asked as he lowered his head, pressing gentle kisses to his shoulder. He stopped when Oikawa pulled away again.

Oikawa looked away, and Iwaizumi noticed a flash of guilt play across his face when he finally spoke.

“We shouldn't be doing this, Iwa. And, you know we shouldn't. Our teammates’ rooms are right there, and they could hear us.”

Oikawa watched as Iwaizumi quietly sighed before nodding as he pulled away. He'd never understand how Hajime was able to just ignore everyone and do what he wanted. Oikawa knew that he could never be like his Iwa-chan. He could never just be with him in spite of what everyone else thought, even though it was what he wanted most in the world.

Iwaizumi was brave, unlike Oikawa. Iwaizumi didn't think twice about being with him; he didn't care what anyone else thought. It was Oikawa who held them back, who was terrified of the world around them and what that world would say. For Oikawa, nobody could know, no matter what.

Then again, Iwaizumi had always been the braver one out of the two.

Oikawa could remember when they first met, could picture it perfectly. Iwaizumi had been the first to react to the spark that signified that they were soulmates, the one that they felt when they touched for the first time. His eyes had widened, and he stared at Oikawa, watching as he realized that they were soulmates as well. And then came the heart wrenching words that had shaped their entire relationship.

“Nobody can know.”

Iwaizumi had stared at Oikawa when he heard the other boy utter those words. He had watched as Oikawa's eyes filled with tears, as Oikawa's heart pounded with the realization that he had to keep his soulmate a secret. Oikawa still didn't know what Iwaizumi had been thinking during those moments. The moments that had changed their lives. The moments that had not only changed their lives, but shaped the rest of their lives up until that point.

Oikawa had known, even at the age of ten, that nobody could find out that his soulmate was a boy. Nobody could know. His parents would never approve, and he knew it.

Everyone knew the stories of what could happen if your soulmate wasn't acceptable to your parents, to the world. Countless stories of people harassed, beaten, disowned, murdered. The worst was places that claimed that they could break the bond between soulmates or transfer the bonds so that they were between two new, acceptable people.

Oikawa had hid. Iwaizumi had hid with him, but it wasn't what Iwaizumi had wanted. He allowed Oikawa to hide. One could say he let Oikawa hide behind him, behind his bravery. Oikawa knew Iwaizumi wanted more, that he wanted to be with Oikawa openly, not just behind closed doors. He knew he wanted to go on proper dates. Dates that Oikawa couldn't offer him.

Because he wasn't brave. Because he was scared.

“Tooru.”

He barely registered Iwaizumi calling his name.

“Tooru, talk to me.”

Oikawa started a bit when he felt Iwaizumi’s hand on his face, cupping his cheek. It grounded him, pulling him back to reality and forcing him to focus on Iwaizumi instead of the endless thoughts that roamed his head. That was something that happened often. Oikawa was always getting lost, and Iwaizumi was always pulling him back, never the other way around. Iwaizumi was his rock. Iwaizumi was what grounded him to reality and kept him from floating away.

He didn't deserve Iwaizumi.

“Tooru, please. Tell me what's on your mind.”

Oikawa felt Iwaizumi brush away a tear he didn't know he had cried, and then the tears continued falling. Oikawa could feel his control slipping as he broke down, letting Iwaizumi pull him into his arms like he did every time Oikawa broke down like this, every time everything became too much. Iwa-chan was always there for him. No matter what.

Iwaizumi pulled the taller boy onto his lap, cradling him like a child, and gently ran his fingers through Oikawa's curls. He looked down as Oikawa pressed his face into his shirt, and Iwaizumi didn't care if Oikawa ruined another one of his shirts or not. They were just shirts, and they could be washed or replaced. But Oikawa couldn't be replaced. He was one of a kind.

And he was his.

“Tooru, please talk to me. I'm here. I'm always here for you. No matter what.”

He needed Oikawa to talk to him. Oikawa didn't like to talk much about his feelings or what was bothering him, but, if he didn't, it caused many more problems in the long run. He would bottle them up, would obsess over things, would be consumed by them, and it would lead to an explosion or some sort of disaster when it finally became too much for him to handle.

“I'm… I'm scared, Hajime. I'm always scared someone is going to find out about us. You know how my parents are. You know what would happen. You know how scared I am everytime we do anything at all! You know, but you still push for more. You know, but you're somehow able to forget about all that. Or you just don't care.”

Oikawa felt more tears slipping down his cheeks, felt Iwaizumi brushing them away, gentle as ever. He knew he was being too harsh towards Iwaizumi, that he did care just like Oikawa did. He was starting to drift back into his thoughts when he heard the reassuring words that Iwaizumi softly spoke near his ear.

“I care, Trashykawa, of course I care. It's easy to forget when I'm with you because you let me forget. I'm always too focused on you to care what anyone else thinks. You're the one who matters, not anyone else.”

Oikawa visibly relaxed, starting to calm down, and Iwaizumi smiled at the thought that he might be the only person in the world who knows Oikawa Tooru well enough to know what to do in any given situation. To calm him when he was upset. To get him to relax.

Not to say what Oikawa said didn't hurt. It always hurt when the other boy lashed out at him, even if Iwaizumi knew he didn't mean it.

“Dinner is soon,” Iwaizumi said as he grabbed a tissue and wiped away the remaining tears before putting the tissue to his nose.

“Blow.”

Oikawa couldn't help but laugh, pushing at Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “I'm not your child, Iwa-chan!”

“You sure cry like a child,” he quipped back, barely suppressing an amused chuckle.

“Mean Iwa-chan!”

Oikawa watched as a smile ghosted across Iwaizumi’s lips while he stubbornly pressed the tissue to his nose again. Iwaizumi chuckled slightly when Oikawa reluctantly blew out into the tissue, smiling when he saw the pout on his soulmate's face.

“What?”

“That was gross, Iwa-chan. I probably look gross,” he said as he pulled away and turned so Iwaizumi couldn't see him. He covered his face like the drama queen that he was. “Don't look, I'm ugly when I cry.”

Iwaizumi laughed. _You didn't care five minutes ago when you were sobbing against me._

“Tooru, you're not ugly when you cry. You always look amazing,” he said as he pulled him back into his arms, earning a cheery smile from Oikawa, who nuzzled against him.

Iwaizumi kissed his cheek, running his fingers through Oikawa's curls again. He could feel him continuing to relax and calm down, just like he always did. Most people wouldn’t be able to tell when they looked at him, but Oikawa was more fragile than he lets on. He worked so hard to project the perfect image of himself to his fans—to the world—but Iwaizumi knew the truth.

Oikawa Tooru was scared and, above all, hurt.


	2. Unfamiliar Places

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone who left kudos or comments! 
> 
> Makki and Matsun are officially here, so enjoy!

Iwaizumi stirred, blinking his eyes open and yawning when he heard the knocking at the door. He knew that he should get up and answer the door, that it was probably time for dinner, but he didn't want to detangle himself from Oikawa. It was rare that they had moments to share a bed together, and looking down at his soulmate's head on his chest didn't give him any motivation to get up.   
  
He knew Oikawa didn't sleep nearly enough, and he definitely didn't want to be the one to wake him up. Plus, he looked so peaceful when he was sleeping, even if Iwaizumi would have to change his shirt since he was drooling all over the one he was currently wearing.   
  
“What are you guys doing in there, having sex?!?” came Hanamaki's yell as he knocked on the door once again.   
  
Iwaizumi groaned and carefully tried to detangle himself from Oikawa, stopping when he felt Oikawa's head lift off his chest. He watched Oikawa take in his surroundings with a dazed look before Iwaizumi gently ran his hand through Oikawa's curls again. He couldn't deny it. He loved his soulmate's curls.   
  
“Sleep well?”   
  
He smiled when Oikawa nodded in response. Iwaizumi tried to stop, knowing Oikawa would be mad at him, but he couldn't help but tease the other boy. He found himself tilting Oikawa's chin towards him, barely containing a laugh when Oikawa closed his eyes. The ravenette was fully aware that Oikawa was expecting a kiss. Instead, Iwaizumi wiped his mouth with a tissue, cleaning off the drool, and Oikawa's eyes shot open when he realized what Iwaizumi was actually doing, his cheeks reddening in embarrassment.   
  
Then came Hanamaki's impatient knock again.   
  
“Would you guys open the door already?!? I'd like to go eat!”   
  
Oikawa quickly sat up, glancing at himself in the mirror and making a displeased noise. He glanced over at Iwaizumi, who was currently in the process of changing his soiled shirt, and he could feel a slight blush dusting across his cheeks. He tried his best not to ogle his soulmate as Iwaizumi started walking towards the door to open it, pulling his shirt over his head. Instead, Oikawa focused on his own reflection and quickly tried to fix his hair.   
  
Iwaizumi wasn't surprised when he opened the door to see Mattsun behind Hanamaki, leaning against the wall. The two were pretty much inseparable.   
  
Hanamaki let out an annoyed sigh when he saw him.   
  
“Finally. What were you guys doing in there?” Hanamaki quipped at him.   
  
Matsukawa poked his head around Hanamaki, taking in the image of Oikawa trying to fix his hair. “Maybe you were right, they probably were banging.”   
  
Oikawa quickly whipped around and pointed a finger at him. “I fell asleep, that's why my hair is messed up! Besides, if anyone is sleeping together, it's you two!”   
  
Hanamaki chuckled in response. “Well, isn't someone getting a little too defensive?” he questioned, raising an eyebrow. “Besides, Matsun is hot, I'd sleep with him,” he said with a wink, earning a smack from Matsukawa.   
  
“Shut up, Makki,” Matsukawa scolded him, which only prompted Hanamaki to shoot him a mischievous smile. Matsukawa rolled his eyes in response, shaking his head a bit.   
  
Iwaizumi fought a smile. “If everyone is done making each other mad, can we go get food? I don't know about you people, but I'm starving.”   
  
Right on cue, a loud gurgle pierced the silence as soon as the words left Iwaizumi’s mouth. Oikawa blushed when everyone looked at him and defensively held up his hands.   
  
“I barely ate lunch, okay?” he said as he stood up and finished fixing his hair.   
  
Hanamaki, unamused, bowed mockingly while he did his best impression of a stuck up elitist, “Oh, yes, of course, Your Royal Highness, my deepest apologies.”   
  
In response, Oikawa stuck out his tongue, using his finger to pull at the skin underneath his eye at the same time. The group of boys, in turn, erupted into laughter.   
  
After a minute or two, they had calmed down, and they began to make their way through the hotel to the dining area, eager for food. If there was anything all four of them shared a passion for, it was volleyball and food, and neither passion could be even slightly considered a secret.   
  
Oikawa couldn't help but think of the first time he and Iwaizumi were able to share a hotel room together. It was a volleyball tournament, just like this one. Opportunities like these were part of the reason that they joined the sport to begin with. Well, the reason that they joined a sport. They chose volleyball because they both enjoyed it. And that enjoyment had quickly grown into a passion.   
  
Sure, they were able to share a bed when they slept over at the other's house, but it wasn't the same. The ever-present fear hung over their heads like a storm ready to inflict its wrath if they ever dared to forget about its presence. Maybe Iwaizumi could forget it, but Oikawa couldn't. That fear had dictated Oikawa's relationship with Iwaizumi from the beginning. It probably always would.   
  
The travel tournaments and training camps offered short reprieves from that fear. Technically, they could still be found out. Technically, someone could still walk in and see them asleep and tangled in each other's arms. Or worse. Doing something that they couldn't explain as an accident.   
  
But there was less of a chance. They had more control over what they were willing to do, what they were comfortable doing, and what they felt secure enough to do. Someone else's key card access to a hotel room didn't get you caught if the secondary lock was in place. The strangeness and unfamiliarity of a town or city miles away from home allowed for secret dates in the middle of the night.   
  
Their very first date had been in some crappy local diner at one in the morning in a town 300 miles away from home. But it had been perfect. Oikawa wouldn't have traded anything in the world for that date. Except maybe the ability to freely be with Iwaizumi.   
  
“Oikawa.”   
  
Hotels were their safety.   
  
“Oikawa.”   
  
Strange, unfamiliar places were the only places they were truly free.   
  
“Oikawa!”   
  
He could feel himself jump, realizing someone was calling his name. No, three someones. Matsukawa, then Iwaizumi, then Hanamaki. He needed to get a grip. He needed to focus.  _ What is with me tonight? _   
  
“Sorry, I don't know what happened there. I'm fine.” He couldn't ignore the look he sensed Iwaizumi give him. He was worried. He was always worried about him. Hanamaki's arm was suddenly around him.   
  
“Hey, we're here if you need anything, Tooru. I know you're best buds with Iwaizumi and all that, but Matsun and I are here for you, too. Don't you forget that,” he said while giving Oikawa a good natured squeeze.   
  
Oikawa couldn't help but smile, and he wrapped his arm around Hanamaki, returning the squeeze. “Same goes for me. I'm here for you guys. Both of you.”  _ No, that's not right. _   
  
“All three of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I updated so late in the day. I had a busy day and it completely slipped my mind. I hope you enjoyed!


	3. Push and Pull

Iwaizumi didn't know how he had managed to keep himself from badgering Oikawa with questions during dinner. They had talked, and Oikawa had let out what had been bothering him in that moment, but he was still upset. Something was still wrong. Either something immediate that Oikawa was keeping from him or something that was a much larger, underlying problem.

Either way, he was worried. He lost track of how many times he caught himself watching Oikawa, searching for clues about what was wrong. For the life of him, he couldn't figure it out. The entire time at dinner, Oikawa seemed off—unfocused and lost in thought. He'd just have to wait until they got back to their room after dinner. Until then, he had to focus on his food.

Way easier said than done.

Oikawa could feel Iwaizumi’s gaze on him all throughout dinner. He could tell from the way he was sitting that he was anxious, that he was itching to ask him something. Racking his brain, he tried to come up with an explanation for what was troubling Iwaizumi. Unable to come up with an answer, he spent most of dinner staring at his plate and pushing his food around, too preoccupied with his thoughts to eat properly.

Which was apparently a mistake, considering the fact that it ended up being one giant misunderstanding.

The second the door closed behind him, Iwaizumi locked it and turned towards Oikawa, looking at him with his genuine serious face. The one that warned Oikawa that Iwaizumi was not in the mood for any funny business.

“Tooru, what's wrong? I'm serious, you need to tell me,” Iwaizumi demanded as he crossed his arms. “This isn't a game, and you shouldn't hide things from me. I'm your soulmate, and you should be able to trust me by now.”

Oikawa didn't know why Iwaizumi was so put out, but he had obviously done something to earn this form of lecture from Iwaizumi. Raising an eyebrow in confusion, Oikawa responded, “Iwa, what are you talking about?”

The sigh that fell from Iwaizumi’s lips startled Oikawa. That sigh was completely different from his usual sigh. It wasn’t the slightly exasperated sigh that he gave when he pretended to be annoyed with whatever antic Oikawa was up to. He only heard that sigh if Iwaizumi was genuinely frustrated or annoyed. More than anything in the world, he hated that sigh. He hated knowing that Iwaizumi was frustrated or annoyed, but, more than anything, he hated that that sigh was directed towards him.

Iwaizumi wasn't just frustrated or annoyed. He was frustrated and annoyed with  _ him _ .

And he didn't even know why.

It was one thing to be the target of that frustration or annoyance when he knew what he was doing—when they were fighting or when Oikawa knew he was being a thorn in his soulmate's side—but not knowing why meant that Oikawa hadn't done something, because he always knew when he had done something to elicit those feelings from Iwaizumi. That meant that he wasn't mad at something Oikawa had done. He was mad at Oikawa.

For the second time that night, Oikawa felt the tears start to gather in his eyes. He hated himself for crying. 

Iwaizumi froze.  _ Why is Oikawa crying? Did I do something? Did I hurt him? No, I… I couldn't have hurt him, could I? _

“Tooru, what's wrong?” he asked, his voice automatically soft. He stepped closer to Oikawa, hesitantly letting his hand slide down the other boy's arm to help coax an answer out of him. Instead, Oikawa yanked his arm away, quickly brushing away the few tears that had fallen, obviously fighting to prevent any more from following.

“What did I do?!?” he cried out, backing away again.

It was Iwaizumi’s turn to be confused. But, he needed to keep his voice calm and level. They were at a hotel. People could hear them. “What do you mean? You didn't do anything.”

“Then why are you mad at me?!? Or frustrated with me or annoyed with me or whatever you are?!?”

Iwaizumi could tell Oikawa was getting more and more defensive, but he didn't understand why. He did know, however, that if Oikawa got any louder, the rooms surrounding them would be fully aware of whatever was going on.

So, he lowered his voice even more when he spoke, hoping Oikawa would follow suit, “Tooru, they'll hear if we're too loud. I'm not mad at you, I promise.” He stepped forward again, carefully reaching for his wrist and pulling the brunette towards him—only to have him pull away again. Oikawa was always pulling away, and Iwaizumi never truly understood why.

“Oikawa Tooru, tell me what's wrong,” he firmly demanded again. If being gentle with him wasn't going to do anything, he didn't have much of an option for what else to do. 

The sob that tore free from Oikawa's chest startled Iwaizumi. It hurt to see him like this. It hurt that Oikawa wasn't letting him comfort him. It hurt that he wouldn't tell him what was wrong.

It hurt, and Iwaizumi was tired of being pushed away by Oikawa. 

So Iwaizumi pushed back.

“All I ever do is try to be there for you, Tooru.” The second the words left his lips, he knew this was going to end ugly. But he continued to push anyways. “Day in and day out, I'm always there. I'm always making sure  _ you're  _ okay. I'm always there for  _ you _ , not for  _ me _ .” He could see what he was doing to Oikawa, but he couldn't stop. “I'm always being considerate of you, of what you're scared of, of what you're comfortable with, but you never care about me!” He felt himself spinning out of control, so he lowered his voice. “I just want to know what's wrong, Tooru, and you won't tell me. And, I don't know what stubborn game this is this time, but I just want to be there for you!”

The broken sobs that fell on his ears brought tears to his own eyes. Tears that threatened to spill over. Tears that threatened to make him break down just like Oikawa was breaking. Like he had broken him. He hurt Oikawa, nobody else. He wasn't helping him get through something,  _ he's  _ the one who hurt him.

How dare he call himself Oikawa's soulmate.

It was like he wasn't even controlling his own body anymore. He wasn't even thinking, he just felt his legs moving him towards to door. Away from Oikawa's sobs. Away from Oikawa.

_ What am I doing? _

He heard Oikawa calling his name, but he didn't stop.

_ Why am I hurting him? Why am I leaving? I should go to him. _

He felt his hand on the door, heard Oikawa stumble to his feet. 

How many times had Oikawa been the one to walk out on Iwaizumi? How many times has he left Iwaizumi chasing after him?

Maybe it was his turn to leave Oikawa Tooru chasing after him.

The door was open, and he suddenly felt Oikawa's hand on his arm, heard his voice begging him to stay.

Maybe it was his turn to pull away.

Iwaizumi felt himself pull his hand away from Oikawa's grip, felt himself step through the door. He heard Oikawa desperately ask where he was going.

“I'm going on a walk.”

And then he shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry 😁


	4. The Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys are enjoying! Sorry if you find the chapters to be short, but this is the length that I find natural when writing. Once school gets out, I might start updating two chapters on Tuesday, but the chapters themselves will probably still be this length.

Oikawa didn't know what to do.

Iwaizumi was gone.

He had left him.

Iwaizumi had left him.

And all he could do was sit there on the ground and cry about it.

He was so pathetic.

Everything Iwaizumi had said to him was true. Iwa was always there for him, but it seemed like Oikawa never returned the favor. Oikawa had thought that was because Iwaizumi didn't need him to be there for him.

Apparently he was wrong.

Iwaizumi did need him. Or maybe that wasn't it. He had said that Oikawa wasn't telling him what was wrong. But nothing was wrong. Nothing immediate and pressing. Nothing besides their ever present problem. Sure, he had been distracted, thinking about the past, but-

That was it.

Oikawa had been lost in thought when they were walking to dinner.

That was what Iwaizumi had been asking about.

He had thought that he was upset.

Because Oikawa was almost always upset when he was lost in thought.

And now Iwaizumi was gone. Because of him. Because he was too stupid to figure out what Iwaizumi meant. He was gone.

So Oikawa chased after him.

He was about twenty minutes into his search for Iwaizumi when he realized that he was lost. Another couple of minutes and it dawned on him that he was cold. Thirty more seconds to realize that he was cold because he hadn't brought a jacket with him. Not even ten seconds to realize that he didn't have his phone.

He was screwed. So beautifully and utterly screwed.

 

* * *

 

Nearly two hours had passed when Iwaizumi finally returned to the hotel. He had felt guilty the entire time, knowing Oikawa was probably still crying—or at least still upset. A fresh wave of guilt washed over him when he pictured his soulmate wrapped up in blankets as he sulked. His cheeks would be tearstained. His eyes would be puffy and red.

Needless to say that he was surprised when he opened the door to their room and saw that it was empty. A quick look around told him that he wasn't in the bathroom or anywhere else in the room. Yet the light was on, and his jacket was where he had left it. Iwaizumi hesitantly took off his own coat, pulling out his phone as he did so.

_I should call him._

No. He was probably just with Matsukawa and Hanamaki. Or downstairs with one of the others. Or in the hotel dining area, trying to snag a late night snack. Or in the hotel bar, trying to convince some pretty bartender to give him a drink despite his age. Or convince some pretty girl to buy him one.

His attempts to rationalize the situation only made him worry more. He needed to talk to Oikawa.

He needed to apologize.

When he heard the ringtone Oikawa had designated specifically for him fill the room, he knew something was wrong.

What had he done?

Where was Tooru?

What had Iwaizumi done to Oikawa?

 

* * *

 

It was Hanamaki's turn to be annoyed.

“I swear to whatever being that's out there controlling the universe that if that's Oikawa or Iwaizumi, I'm going to kill them. Both of them, even if only one of them is out there.”

Matsukawa laughed, using his foot to push Hanamaki towards the door while he spoke.  “Don't be such a baby, Hiro. Go open the door.”

Hanamaki didn't hesitate to flip him off as he walked over to the door, opening it and shifting the target of his middle finger from Matsukawa to Iwaizumi as he leaned against the doorframe in annoyance.

“Iwa, what do you want? It's late.”

He heard Matsukawa snicker behind him before he spoke, “Makki, it's, like, eight o'clock.”

He resisted the sudden urge to throw something at him, choosing to instead look towards Iwaizumi.

That was when he realized something was wrong. Iwaizumi looked stricken—terrified even. He immediately straightened up, dropping his hand.

“Iwa, what's wrong?”

Matsukawa, noticing the shift in Hanamaki's attitude, quickly stood up and walked over to the door, standing behind Hanamaki.

“Oikawa is gone.”

Hanamaki felt like he'd been hit with a brick. “What do you mean, he's gone? Gone where?”

“I-I don't know. He could be anywhere. I came back and the light was on and his jacket was still there and he left his phone and I was hoping he was with you, but he's obviously not, and I don't know what to do,” came the rushed reply. Iwaizumi looked like he might hyperventilate.

Hanamaki had never seen him like this. Sure, he'd seen him upset, but this was different. Iwaizumi looked panicked. He looked like he might cry. Something more had to have happened between them if Iwaizumi was this worried.

It was if Iwaizumi had read his thoughts.

“We… we got into a fight of sorts. He was upset, and I left, and I shouldn't have, but I did, and now he's gone, and it's my fault.” Iwaizumi was looking at his hands, not focusing on either Hanamaki or Matsukawa.

Before Hanamaki could formulate a response, Matsukawa was pushing a jacket into his hands, already wearing his own. “Grab his jacket and phone. We'll help you look for him. And, leave a note in your room. Somewhere where he'll see it if he comes back.”

Completely in contrast to Matsukawa's calm and collected plan, Hanamaki voiced what they had all been thinking.

“You don't think… you don't think that he's going to do something… do you?”

Hanamaki shouldn't have said it. He knew he shouldn't have said it. The second he did, he regretted it. He saw the realization and fear spread across Iwaizumi’s face. He watched as he blamed himself, and he could practically feel the daggers Matsukawa was glaring into his back. He didn't have to look to know what look Matsukawa was giving him.

Hanamaki knew he should have kept his mouth shut.

But it needed to be said. All of them knew Oikawa well, and it would be a blatant lie to try to ignore the truth.

Oikawa is self-destructive. They all knew it; he was full of bad habits—destructive habits. They were habits that caused them to worry, and rightly so.

The only difference was that Iwaizumi was normally there to keep him safe, to keep him on the right track and help keep those habits in check.

Oikawa was rash. He let his emotions dictate what he did, and he let them get the better of him.

Hanamaki knew one thing for certain.

They needed to hurry up and find Oikawa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again to everyone who has been commenting and leaving kudos, especially Persephonee, who has left a comment on every chapter!


	5. Paranoia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized that the next chapter I had written was a bit short, so I decided to go ahead and post it today with the other one.

Oikawa had given up on trying to find his way back about an hour into his search for the hotel. It would have been helpful if he knew what hotel they were staying at, but he hadn’t paid attention. And there were a lot of hotels.

He was scared.

It was stupid of him to leave, and he knew it. He should have been thinking. Iwaizumi had said he was going on a walk, and he had his phone. Oikawa could have just called him. He could have simply just waited in the hotel room like he should have.

Instead, he made a rash and stupid decision. He ran off to try and play the hero, and now he was lost. 

He could borrow someone’s phone, but he didn't think it would do much good. Oikawa knew Iwaizumi’s number by heart, but Iwa had a habit of not answering his phone if he didn't recognize the number. Plus, he was mad, so Oikawa wasn't even sure he would pick up if he knew it was him.

Fed up with the cold, he decided to duck into a cafe, knowing that he had enough money on him even without his wallet to get a cup of coffee or two—coffee that he desperately needed. 

Oikawa had a plan. He was going to drink his coffee and then ask to use their phone. He'd try Iwaizumi first, but if he didn't pick up, he'd call Hanamaki and Matsukawa. Even if they didn't pick up, one of them was sure to check their voicemail. 

_ See, idiot? If only you had calmed down earlier, then you would have been out of this mess a lot sooner.  _

His plan was his first mistake. Well, the second part of his plan wasn't. Getting the coffee was the mistake. As he sat there, Oikawa could feel himself getting pulled back into his thoughts again.

What if Iwaizumi was better off without him? Sure, they were soulmates, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. Being soulmates didn't guarantee someone happiness. It didn't mean that you were even necessarily the best for each other. It meant that at one point, you were the ideal, perfect people for each other. But things change. Events change people. People develop mental illnesses. They might value their relationship with someone else over the possibility of having a relationship with their soulmate. They might become so twisted beyond what they originally were—what they were meant to be—that they weren't really their partner's soulmate, all because their real soulmate had ceased to exist in the end.

Maybe Iwaizumi would be happier without him. At the same time, the voice in the back of his mind reminded him that he didn't just have an obligation to Iwaizumi, he had an obligation to his team. What was he even thinking? What did he think he was going to do? Run away? To where? With what? What would that accomplish? All he would do is throw away his life. He was such an idiot. It wasn't like he had an out option. Staying was his only option.

But that led him to other questions. Would anyone miss him if he did leave?

He could feel the dialogue with himself starting to form, could feel his own conflict with himself. It was his way to try to logically reason through his problems. He always found himself holding conversations with himself, playing the devil and the angel on his own shoulders to try and reach a secure middle ground. He did it to force himself to quell his paranoia—and to identify it in the first place. If he could find solid reasons behind something, then he wasn't being paranoid. If he couldn't, then he was. Oikawa found himself mumbling quietly into his coffee like he always did when he was alone and mulling in his thoughts.

“Who would miss you?”  _ Iwaizumi would. _

“But all you do is cause him problems. All you do is annoy and irritate him.”  _ He loves me. _

“What proof do you have that he loves you?”  _ He's told me he does. _

“People lie.”  _ Iwaizumi doesn't. _

“But he's lied to you before.”  _ When? What are three major lies that Iwaizumi has ever told me? _

He couldn't come up with any. Oikawa smiled and took a sip of his coffee with the notion that he had won. He was just being paranoid. But the nagging voice came back.

“Whether he loves you or not doesn't prove that you don't cause him problems.”

Oikawa couldn't form a good rebuttal to the statement he had made. He did cause Iwaizumi a lot of problems. And, it would be one thing if Iwaizumi caused him problems as well, but he didn't. Oikawa was the only one in their relationship that caused problems. Oikawa was the one who strained their relationship, not Iwaizumi—never Iwaizumi. Everything that was wrong in their lives stemmed from Oikawa.

He felt a tear slowly travel down his cheek, but he didn't bother to brush it away. He barely noticed when it followed the curve of his chin, rolling underneath his chin before it fell to the table.

“You're everything that's wrong with Iwaizumi Hajime's life.”

He couldn't deny it. He couldn't disprove it. Instead, another tear fell down his face.

_ Wrong. Close, but wrong. _

He stared at his coffee once again.

“You're the  _ only _ thing that's wrong with Iwaizumi Hajime's life,” he whispered into it.

_ The only thing wrong with his life is me. Only me. _


	6. The Discovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Tuesday!
> 
> This is a shorter chapter, so I’m going to upload chapter seven later today.

Iwaizumi was the one who suggested that they split up to cover the most ground. What he didn't say was that he was going to be the one to find him because he had an advantage over them. He was Oikawa's soulmate, and he could feel the slight tug towards Oikawa. The slight tug that tied them together no matter how far apart they were. It wasn't very noticeable; it was more like an instinct. The tug was more noticeable to some than others. Oikawa had always said that it was hard for him to pick up on it to find Iwaizumi, but Iwaizumi could use it to find him fairly easily.

This wasn't an exception.

However, he didn't expect Oikawa to be in a cafe. He nearly walked past until he caught a glimpse of the familiar brown curls in the window.

And then he was running into the cafe. He didn't miss the way Oikawa's head shot up with the sudden sound, and he instantly felt guilty. He knew how Oikawa wasn't very fond of sudden loud noises. Taking a deep breath to center himself, he slid into the other side of the booth so that he was facing his soulmate.

“Found you,” he said in an attempt to break the tension. Iwaizumi couldn't put his finger on it, but something was definitely not right. Something besides the fact that he had blown up at Oikawa earlier that evening.

“Maybe you shouldn't have,” came the mumbled reply.

_What was that about?_

Iwaizumi found himself standing and moving into Oikawa's side of the booth before he could even process his own actions. He felt himself put a hand on Oikawa's shoulder as he turned to face him, felt his other hand drop onto Oikawa's leg. He didn't miss the way that Oikawa unconsciously pressed closer to him.

“Tooru, please talk to me. I… I'm sorry. About earlier. If I hurt you, I'm sorry, and I didn't mean to. I just…” he trailed off, absentmindedly tracing circles on Oikawa's leg.

He was surprised when he heard Oikawa reply in a soft voice, “Okay, but not here.”

He had expected Oikawa to yell, to scream at him. Or to do anything at all besides what he had actually—not that he was complaining. He was tired of fighting with his soulmate.

Iwaizumi nodded, and, in a moment of rash judgement, leaned forward and kissed directly underneath Oikawa's ear. He felt Oikawa lean into it, saw his eyes close because Iwaizumi knew exactly where to kiss to make his heart flutter.

And then the reality hit. And Oikawa was shoving him away, a look of panic taking over his expression.

“Iwa, what are you doing? We're- somebody could see!”

Iwaizumi looked down at his hands. Lately, it seemed like he only upset Oikawa with his affections no matter what he did. He understood why he was pushing him away. He understood that Oikawa was scared, even understood _why_ he was scared. But, the longer they tried to hide themselves, the harder it became for Iwaizumi to try and do what Oikawa wanted him to do. He wanted to love Oikawa without restraint.

“I'm sorry, Tooru,” he said without looking up. He continued on, “We can go now if you want. So that we can talk.”

Oikawa surprised him yet again when he put his hand on Iwaizumi’s arm and quickly kissed his cheek after glancing around to see if anyone was watching them. It seemed that Oikawa was full of surprises tonight.

Iwaizumi watched as Oikawa nodded and went to stand up, lightly pushing him to get him to move out of the booth. He smiled and complied, holding out Oikawa's jacket as he stood and moved out of his seat.

Oikawa gratefully took it and put it on before downing what was left of his coffee and flashing Iwaizumi his signature smile.

“Thanks, Iwa-chan.”

“Of course, Shittykawa. Now, come on. We have things to talk about.”

And with that they were gone, not noticing that the unreadable eyes of Ushijima Wakatoshi were following their movements as they left.


	7. The Talk

Iwaizumi sat Oikawa down on a bench at a nearby park, making sure to text both Matsukawa and Hanamaki to let them know that he had found Oikawa and that he was safe. He could tell Oikawa was anxious, so he patiently waited for him to initiate their much needed talk.

Fidgeting with his fingers, he finally spoke, “You're better off without me. I only cause you problems, Iwa. You could…” he trailed off, unable to look at Iwaizumi, who could only stare at him in disbelief. What was Oikawa saying? He was his  _ soulmate _ . He didn't want anyone else besides Oikawa at his side.

Taking a shaky breath, he continued on, “We could go to one of those centers, the ones where they can remove the bond between soulmates. That way you could stop being weighed down by me. You could be free of-”

“Shittykawa, shut up,” came Iwaizumi’s firm response. 

Startled, Oikawa looked up, focusing on Iwaizumi instead of his own hands. However, he did shut up while attempting to prepare himself for whatever Iwaizumi was about to tell him in his newest lecture.

“We aren’t going to one of those centers. I refuse to let you even think about it. Never in a million years would I allow you to—”

“But—”

“No, Tooru. You don’t have an option here. You’re my soulmate. We belong to each other, and I’m not going to let you get it into your head that we aren’t right for each other.”

Throughout the entire time he spoke, Iwaizumi never broke eye contact with Oikawa. He needed Oikawa to understand. He needed Oikawa to get it through his thick skull that Iwaizumi was never going to leave him—no matter what Oikawa did to him.

 

* * *

 

 

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” Hanamaki asked when they had finally reached their room.

“Oikawa is tougher than you two give him credit for,” was Matsukawa's reply as he locked the door behind him.

Hanamaki plopped down on his bed, watching as Matsukawa took his jacket off. “I know he's tough, I just worry about him.”

Matsukawa smiled. “Iwa worries enough about him for the three of us times six.”

Cracking a smile, Hanamaki chuckled. “Well, you aren't necessarily wrong.”

Rolling his eyes, Matsukawa joined Hanamaki on the bed. “I'm never wrong, you should know that by now.”

Hanamaki grinned. “I know.”

 

* * *

 

When Oikawa had started to cry, there wasn't anything he could have done to stop it. The tears didn't stop falling down his cheeks until Iwaizumi had held him for a long time. He could feel his eyes growing heavy, could feel how exhausted he was, and he wanted nothing more than to sleep. And, he would have, but he didn't want Iwaizumi to have to carry him. He had put his Iwa-chan through enough, he didn't need yet another problem stemming from Oikawa to deal with.

_ I'm so pathetic. All I do is cry. _

Wiping away his tears with his sleeve, Iwaizumi seemed to read his mind. “Shittykawa, stop it. Stop whatever you're thinking, because you're perfect and amazing and I love you. I love you so much,” he said, clutching Oikawa closer. Oikawa let himself get lost in his warm embrace, tucked carefully in his arms with Iwaizumi’s chin resting on top of Oikawa's head.

In that moment, he didn't care who saw, who might happen to pass by at any given second. All he cared about was Iwaizumi, about how good it felt to be with him.

He needed to stop second-guessing Iwaizumi. He needed to stop second-guessing himself. He needed to stop second-guessing their relationship. He needed to step second-guessing the way that Iwaizumi cared for him, the way that he would always care for him.

He was a mess, and he knew it.  _ I'm so messed up. I'm broken, but Hajime still wants me for some reason. No. He wants me because he loves me—because we're Soulmates. Even if my soul is fractured, broken, and ruined. He still wants me. He wants me for who I am, messed up mind, broken soul, and all. _

After what had felt like an eternity, Oikawa felt better—he felt good. He felt at rest, and he who Iwaizumi was the one he could thank for that, nobody else.

“Can we go back to the hotel now?”

Smiling softly, Iwaizumi ran his fingers through Oikawa's curls. “Of course. You look exhausted.”

“I am,” Oikawa sheepishly admitted as he stood up. “But I wouldn't be opposed to putting on an alien documentary or movie when we got back.”

Iwaizumi chuckled and lightly pushed at his shoulder. “Of course you wouldn't,” he said, his eyes holding an emotion that Oikawa couldn't quite place. It wasn't love. It was something more than that. Something more significant, something that could begin to capture the depths of their relationship and bond in a word. That word didn't exist, at least not to Oikawa's knowledge, but the feeling did. That feeling, that emotion, was what he felt every time he was with Iwaizumi when they could simply just exist. Not when they were arguing or worrying or sad, but when they were at peace. 

“Let’s go,” he said, squeezing Iwaizumi’s hand one last time before he let go and started to walk in the direction that he assumed the hotel was in, trying not to think about how he was always pulling away from Iwaizumi. He hated that he pulled away, but he knew he needed to. For both of their sakes. For his own sake.

“Trashykawa, the hotel is that way,” Iwaizumi said, pointing in the opposite direction and concealing an amused chuckle. 

“Right, I knew that. I was just testing you,” he said as he turned to follow his soulmate.

Iwaizumi scoffed, unable to hide his amusement. “Sure you were. C’mon, I want to get to sleep.”

Oikawa smiled and hurried after him. Iwaizumi was always leading him places, and this was no exception.

By the time they got back to the hotel, Oikawa was so tired that he felt like he might collapse from exhaustion. Ever the loving boyfriend and gentleman, Iwaizumi helped Oikawa into his pajamas, stealing a few kisses as payment—which sleepy Oikawa didn’t mind at all. 

The next thing he knew, he was being carefully tucked into bed, nearly falling asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. He didn’t, though, instead managing to stay awake long enough to feel another warm body slip under the covers, strong arms wrapping around his torso and waist before pulling Oikawa close to him. He felt Iwaizumi press a gentle kiss to his shoulder and he snuggled closer in response, leaning his head back against Iwaizumi.

As he drifted off to sleep, he managed to murmur the truest and simplest words he had spoken that day, words that were the core of his being and at the center of everything he did.

“I love you, Hajime.”


	8. What You Need

He could hear the sound of the tires squealing, of the horrific sound of the crash, followed by the awful sound of metal grinding on metal. Of the screams that followed.

He could feel his entire body jerking forward, the seatbelt resisting the movement and leaving his chest and shoulder in pain, followed by the feeling of being upside down. Of the feeling of blood that wasn’t his own splattering onto his skin.

He could feel the sting from his own wounds. He could feel his own blood on his skin. He could hear screaming from the seat next to him. He could—

Oikawa bolted up, gasping. Iwaizumi was immediately sitting up, still dazed and half asleep. Taking in Oikawa’s heavy breathing, his panicked state, and the cold sweat covering his skin, Iwaizumi wrapped his arms around him and pulled him to his chest.

“Bad dream?” he softly asked, carefully running his fingers through Oikawa’s hair.

Oikawa nodded and turned towards Iwaizumi, pressing his face into his shoulder and letting out a broken sob. Without hesitating, Iwaizumi pulled him closer and kissed his forehead.

“It’s okay, Tooru. I’m here. Whatever you need. If you want to talk about it or if you want me to just hold you. Anything you need.” Iwaizumi spoke softly, making sure his voice wasn’t too harsh or sudden. He watched Oikawa like a hawk, taking in every microreaction that he had.

“It… it was the accident.”

Oikawa could practically feel the way Iwaizumi’s heart clenched in worry. Iwaizumi was always worrying about him.

“All of it or just some?” Iwaizumi asked, carefully running his fingers through Oikawa’s damp curls.

“Just some,” he said, pressing closer to him and closing his eyes, letting Iwaizumi soothe him back into a calmer state of mind. “Can you put on a movie?”

Iwaizumi kissed his head. “Of course.”

Oikawa didn’t even have to speak. Iwaizumi just knew what he wanted—what he needed. An old documentary about aliens that happened to be one of Oikawa’s favorites was put on before Oikawa could think to ask. He let a small smile ghost across his face, and he snuggled closer against Iwaizumi.

As the documentary progressed, Oikawa found himself mouthing the words, sometimes speaking them as they were said. Iwaizumi simply smiled and continued to run his fingers through Oikawa's curls in an attempt to calm him. As he noticed Oikawa calm down, he let his fingers venture elsewhere, rubbing up and down Oikawa's arms and wrapping one arm around his waist, tracing patterns on his stomach.

Oikawa let out a content sigh and tipped his head back, pressing a kiss to Iwaizumi's jaw. He loved Iwaizumi's jaw—it was one of his guilty indulgences that he was sure Iwaizumi knew about but didn't care much about since it resulted in a lot of attention from Oikawa, especially Oikawa's lips.

Breathing out small sigh after his breath had hitched ever so slightly, Iwaizumi let his other hand wander onto Oikawa's thigh, tracing more comforting patterns there.

Oikawa closed his eyes and nestled against him, pressing his face into his neck and breathing deeply, allowing himself to just simply exist with Iwaizumi. Listening to the documentary, he wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi, in turn, kissed the top of his head, drawing him closer. “I love you, Tooru,” he murmured against Oikawa’s ear.

Oikawa smiled against Iwaizumi’s neck. “I love you, too, Hajime.”

When Oikawa fell asleep again, he was greeted only by pleasant dreams and thoughts of Iwaizumi. Almost as a sort of apology, his dreams took him back to his first kiss, which also happened to be his first kiss with Iwaizumi.

Oikawa had been laying on his bed, listless and without purpose, utterly bored out of his mind. His parents were away on yet another business trip, and he had the house to himself except for when people came over to check on him. So, naturally, he called Iwaizumi.

When he heard the knock on the door, he practically flew down the stairs. Beaming, he opened the door and grabbed Iwaizumi’s hand, pulling him inside. Iwaizumi chuckled a bit and shut the door, locking it since it was supposed to always be locked, especially when Oikawa’s parents were out of town.

Oikawa beamed up at Iwaizumi, who was taller than Oikawa at the time, and hugged him. “Iwa-chan, you came!” Oikawa cried, grinning up at him.

Iwaizumi playfully rolled his eyes. “Of course I did. You would have never stopped complaining if I hadn’t.”

Oikawa crossed his arms and pouted up at him. “Mean Iwa-chan!”

Smiling, Iwaizumi pulled him back into a hug and kissed his forehead.

Oikawa gleefully threw himself into Iwaizumi’s embrace and rested his head against him. Even at eleven, Oikawa relied on Iwaizumi—when he was sad, happy, in a mood, beating himself up over something, or anything else he could possibly feel.

“Iwa-chan, can we watch the new Aliens movie that just got released?”

“Only if we can watch the new Godzilla movie afterwards.”

Oikawa pouted. “But we already saw the new Godzilla movie.”

“We already saw the new Aliens movie,” Iwaizumi shot back.

Oikawa grinned. “You’re right. Fine, we’ll watch both.

Even at eleven, Iwaizumi knew what Oikawa needed. When he was lonely, Iwaizumi knew that what he needed was his Iwa-chan and a movie.

After the movie came yet another discussion about aliens by Oikawa. Iwaizumi prefers to call them ramblings instead of discussions.

Eager to watch the Godzilla movie, Iwaizumi was trying to figure out a way to get Oikawa to stop talking. Needless to say, nothing was working. Eventually, he decided on physical affection, wrapping his arms around Oikawa and hugging him.

Oikawa’s breath hitched ever so slightly, and he stammered for a few moments, but he continued on discussing the practicalities of why aliens were real. Defeated, Iwaizumi resigned himself to listen.

The longer he listened to Oikawa, the more endearing he became. Iwaizumi flushed when he realized that he had been staring at Oikawa’s lips and thinking about how he wanted to kiss him. Ignoring the thought, he leaned his head against the couch, still hugging Oikawa, who was nestled happily in his arms. After awhile, he lifted his head back up.

“Tooru,” Iwaizumi said.

“Hm?” was Oikawa’s response as he momentarily paused his train of thought and turned towards Iwaizumi.

And then Iwaizumi had kissed him.

It wasn’t anything spectacular, just a simple press of Iwaizumi’s lips against Oikawa’s, but Oikawa had felt like he was going to explode. He wrapped his arms more tightly around Iwaizumi and closed his eyes, pressing closer to him.

Iwaizumi’s heart, like Oikawa’s, had been racing beyond belief, and when they finally pulled away from each other after enjoying blissful togetherness, both of their cheeks were red.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa breathily said.

“Yeah?” Iwaizumi asked, his cheeks flushed and heart still racing.

Oikawa pressed closer until their noses bumped, causing both boys to blush even more than they had been. “I love you, Hajime.”

Both of them had said those three words before, but it had been different. Neither could have explained it if they were asked, but it felt entirely different—less like two kids who knew that they loved each other because they were Soulmates and best friends and more like two people who knew that they loved each other because they knew that they truly did, that the other was their everything and they were everything to the other.

“I love you, too, Tooru.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, a huge thank you to everyone who has been reading and commenting!


	9. Not For Anything

During a break in training, Oikawa decided that he wanted to go on a walk. After a few minutes of pleading, Iwaizumi gave in. As they were walking, Oikawa was stopped by a familiar voice. 

“Oikawa.”

Furiously, Oikawa spun on his heel. “I’m not going to your stupid school, Ushiwaka! And, I don’t regret not going!” He felt Iwaizumi’s hand lightly touch the small of his back.

“I just wanted to say that I understand,” Ushijima said, watching Oikawa.

Oikawa blinked, fumbling for words. “You… you what?”

“I understand why you didn’t want to come. But, if all you needed was for Iwaizumi to come with you, that could have been arranged.”

Oikawa was completely lost for words. “I… why do you think that’s why I didn’t? Maybe I didn’t want to go to your stupid elitist school.”

“Because you and Iwaizumi are soulmates, are you not?” Ushijima asked.

When Oikawa didn’t respond, he continued on. “Unless you two are just dating. I just thought it made sense if you were soulmates—”

Oikawa’s fist connected with Ushijima’s face before anyone could even think to react, and Iwaizumi was pulling Oikawa back just as fast. 

“Tooru!” He yelled, locking his arms around Oikawa’s, holding them behind Oikawa’s back.

Oikawa struggled against his grip for a few minutes before giving up, slumping back against Iwaizumi. Ushijima was still holding his face with a stunned expression across it.

Even though he stopped struggling, he didn’t stop glaring at Ushijima. Iwaizumi held him tighter and looked at Ushijima.

“Are… are you okay?” He asked the bigger boy. 

Ushijima nodded and lowered his hand from his face. “Why did you hit me?”

Oikawa practically fumed. “You have no right saying stuff like that! Spreading false rumors.” His heart ached just saying the words, and he felt Iwaizumi’s hand gently rub his arm in an attempt to calm and soothe Oikawa. It didn’t work.

Ushijima blinked. “Rumors? False rumors? I saw you two kiss yesterday night.”

Iwaizumi barely had time to react when Oikawa fell, barely managing to catch him as he fainted. He couldn’t help but shoot a small glare at Ushijima as he cradled the unconscious boy against him.

“Please go and don’t tell anyone. I… I don’t know what your angle is, if you’re trying to blackmail him into coming to your team or something else, but it needs to stop here. You… You can’t do anything with the information you have.” Iwaizumi straightened up. “Or you and I will have a problem.”

Ushijima looked startled. “Do anything with? Blackmail? Why would I?”

Iwaizumi clutched Oikawa closer. “I don’t know, but if you try anything, I swear—”

“Iwaizumi, I wouldn’t tell anyone anything,” he said as he crouched down in front of him. “My soulmate is a boy. I understand why you’d want to keep it hidden. Our friends know and so do his parents, but my parents don’t know. I hope you can see that I wouldn’t tell anyone because you could do the same for me.”

Guiltily looking down, Iwaizumi relaxed a bit. “I’m sorry.”

Ushijima settled down so he was sitting next to him. “It’s alright. Will he be okay?”

Iwaizumi nodded. “Yeah, it happens sometimes when he gets too overwhelmed. Almost as if everything just shuts down so he can deal with it.” When Ushijima nodded his acknowledgement, Iwaizumi looked at him with curiosity. “Who’s your soulmate?”

“Tendou,” came the immediate reply, and Iwaizumi watched as a smile ghosted across his face. “I was the one who suggested he come to Shiratorizawa.”

Iwaizumi couldn’t help but smile. “Seems like we both got stuck with annoying soulmates.”

Ushijima let out a soft chuckle. “Yeah, I guess.” He looked at Iwaizumi. “But would you change it for anything?”

Iwaizumi felt his smile broaden as he looked down at Oikawa. 

“Not for anything.”

* * *

 

 

When Oikawa woke up, he was lying in the bed at the hotel. Confused, he glanced around, stopping when he met Iwaizumi’s worried green eyes.

“Iwa? Why am I here?” he asked, sitting up as he did so.

“You fainted. Coach let me take you back to the hotel and told me to stay with you. Do you remember why you fainted?”

Oikawa started to shake his head when he suddenly remembered. Sitting straight up, he tried to get out of the bed. “Ushijima! He—”

“Isn’t a problem and won’t tell anyone,” Iwaizumi finished for him.

“But—”

“He’s in a similar situation.”

Oikawa blinked and tilted his head. “What?”

“Tendou is his soulmate. Tendou’s parents know and so do their friends, but his parents don’t—and can’t—know,” he explained.

Oikawa hummed thoughtfully. “I never would have guessed.”

“Which part?”

“Any of it, I guess. So, he’s not going to tell anyone?”

“He said that we would have the right to tell anyone about him and Tendou if he ever did.”

Oikawa let out a sigh of annoyance. “Who knew Ushiwaka would be so nice?”

“Not you, for starters,” Iwaizumi teased.

“Hey! Mean Iwa-chan!” Oikawa yelled, shoving him. He had intended for the shove to be light and playful, but the fact that Iwaizumi was now on the floor said otherwise.

“Trashykawa!” Iwaizumi roared and pushed himself back up.

Oikawa couldn’t help but burst into laughter. “Sorry, sorry!” He yelled as he backed against the bed.

Iwaizumi grinned and grabbed his ankle, pulling him towards him. “Oh, yeah?” He inquired, cocking an eyebrow at the taller boy as he looked down at him.

Trying to contain his laughter, Oikawa nodded, on hand covering his mouth. “Iwa-chan, please? I’m sorry.”

Iwaizumi’s eyes danced with mirth. “I don’t believe you.”

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa whined, “why do you have to torture me so? Why don’t you believe me?”

Iwaizumi smirked and tugged him closer, still holding his ankle. He knew Oikawa could easily get away if he wanted, but he also knew that Oikawa didn’t want to get away. “Because I don’t, and I’m right.”

Oikawa shook his head, his chocolate curls bouncing as he did so. “You’re wrong, Iwa-chan.”

“When am I ever wrong?” Iwaizumi countered, holding Oikawa’s gaze challengingly.

Oikawa scoffed. “All the time.”

Leaning forward, Iwaizumi raised his eyebrow again. “Like when?” He challenged, leaning over Oikawa. 

Oikawa grinned, and Iwaizumi got the distinct feeling that he was exactly where Oikawa wanted him.

“Like when you claim to love me more.” Oikawa snaked his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck and pulled him down on top of him, letting his lips graze against Iwaizumi’s, and Iwaizumi could feel his face heat up.

“Tooru—” he started to say, stopping when he felt Oikawa’s lips at his ear.

He could practically feel Oikawa’s devilish grin against his ear, and then Oikawa spoke.

“Because I love me more,” he said as he leaned back on the bed, laughing and clearly pleased with himself.

Iwaizumi scowled and huffed, shoving at Oikawa’s shoulder. “Well, if that isn’t the truest sentence that I’ve ever heard you say, then—”

He was cut off by Oikawa’s lips pressing against his mouth. Fighting a smile, he let himself fall into the kiss, shifting closer to Oikawa.

Oikawa broke the kiss and looked up at him, smiling. “I love you, Hajime,” he stated proudly.

Iwaizumi smiled and let more of his weight drop onto Oikawa, capturing his lips in another kiss. “I know you do,” he murmured against him, and Oikawa wrapped his arms snugly around Iwaizumi and pulled him closer, smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! See you next Tuesday!


End file.
